i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
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Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
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It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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