I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vagina is talking i cant
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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