Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
