I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
