We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
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