someone get that fucking seahorse.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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