you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Randomize
