I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
