one two three fourrrrnication!
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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