I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
