I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
