I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Randomize