I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize