What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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