My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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