if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize