Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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