its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I am naked and annoyed.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize