Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
