I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
