hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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