I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
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