The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"