if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Randomize
