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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?

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• (940): View more from Texas

  That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.

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• (530): View more from California

  you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.

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  23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (630): View more from Illinois

  the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair

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• (954): View more from Florida

  Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.

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• (949): View more from California

  My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay

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  These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice

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• (601): View more from Mississippi

  Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.

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• (210): View more from Texas

  Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.

  (682): View more from Texas

  Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.

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• (210): View more from Texas

  Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who

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• (817): View more from Texas

  And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet

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