omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
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