is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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