CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize