Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize