I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Randomize
