Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
