Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
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