my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
accomplished twins. life is a go
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
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