she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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