Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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