Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
