i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
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