we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
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