Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize