Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
