I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
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