Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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