sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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