only if we run a train.
done.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Randomize
