the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Just cropdusted the office
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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