After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
