so that wasnt chicken after all
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
