It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
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