I think I just saw someone hide a body.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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