hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
She's just so happy...and so naked.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
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