did you get engaged???
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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